Any time I make a decision to do something that would please God, I step onto a path that is both narrow and slippery. In the beginning of this year, I made a decision to BE the woman I was meant to be – that I longed to be. I vowed to lose weight, eat healthy, de-clutter my house and my life, and other things.
I started off great, as I usually do. At the beginning of March I had lost a total of 11.2 lbs. – which is great being that my goal was to lose 5 lbs a month. I was recording my weight loss at the beginning of each week in my daily planner. I was on track and feeling productive. But something has happened this past week – and if I continue to ignore it (as I have done in the past), I will find myself completely off the path I have chosen, and headed down the wrong direction.
“Ponder the path of your feet,
And let all your ways be established.
Do not turn to the right or the left;
Remove your foot from evil.” Pr. 4:26-27
This path I am on is extremely slippery, and I know I have slipped. I picture myself on a narrow path at the top of a cliff. If I do not look ahead keep my eyes on God, with my feet being firmly planted on that path – I will veer towards the edge and lose my footing. My current position is that I have fallen off but grabbed the edge of the cliff and am struggling to climb back up. I could just let go. I know there is another path within a safe falling distance. I will not get injured. And, in fact, it’s a much easier path to walk on, quite honestly. It’s wide – and not really slippery. But before I do that yet again, before I allow myself to lose my way – I am confronting this. Can my admission save me? Not really. But my confession can. I cry out to God, my Heavenly Father! “Help me! Please pull me up, back onto the path that I know You want me on. Back where you are. Where I trust in You. Where I am not distracted from the things you want me to do. I am sorry, and I don’t want to do this anymore!”
“From the end of the earth I will cry to You,
When my heart is overwhelmed;
Lead me to the rock that is higher than I.” Ps 61:2
Doing good things is good. It’s great. But I get relaxed in my resolve. I didn’t record my weight this past Monday. Because it showed gain, and not a loss. I tend to do that, subconsciously thinking the problem will go away if I ignore it. My workouts have not been as strong and focused. They have been more of a “let’s get this over with” sort of thing. And my personal devotion time has been kinda the same this week. There it is! That’s what it boils down to. When I am emotionally distant from God, whether I am still reading devotions and the Word or not – my world is not right! Where I am spiritually affects where I am in every other aspect of my life. And so here I hang on the edge of my cliff.
I have gained 2.6 lbs. I know, I know – some of you will say that’s not bad, etc. But what have I lost? I lost a whole week of my life. I lost my close connection to my Lord. I lost my resolve. I was trying on the outside, but with no results because on the inside – my heart was not in it.
I lost my footing.
I am making this public, calling myself out. Crying out to God. Because what is in my darkness needs to be exposed to the Light. Then it loses it’s power.
By the grace of God, I will look up towards heaven, and see Him – holding out His hands to me, waiting to pull me up and plant me on the right path again.
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
And lean not on your own understanding;
In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He shall direct your paths.” Pr 3:5-6
I pray this post encourages you, if you are in a place of complacency – to cry out to God.